I never liked and never found the famous phrase "there is no love like the first" funny.
It must be in adolescence that this so-called Love appears, at the same time when we are still learning to control the wide range of emotions that we begin to experience.
I look back at my first love, and I see nothing in it that I would like to bring to subsequent loves. I look back and the only thing that makes me smile is innocence, everything else doesn't. I prefer to live a mature Love where innocence is exchanged for vulnerability. Where I *now* know that to have a strong relationship I cannot hide the shame, the fears, the tears, the doubts and everything that shows me less capable.
In the first love, I would even say in the first loves, she separated the day-to-day feelings, as if they were two separate kingdoms, Love and the rest, her and the others! It was possible to live in both worlds, independently, neither affected the other, but the world of Love was priority.
I don't imagine it's possible to live a love more innocently than the first, but I do imagine that every time we experience a new love, it's better and better, it's bigger and bigger, it's more Love.
We learn to live a raw Love, without the need to polish it, it has edges, it has cuts, it can hurt, it will hurt, but it will also shine, without effort, without removing any chips.
In first loves we don't know what to do, but we think we have to do something, after all, the so respectful, powerful and omnipresent Love chose me too! Let's do things! And tiredness comes... and disappointment comes... and... nothing comes!
I've already given myself to Love, I've already undressed myself for it, I've already been hurt. And I look back, and I see that he didn't ask me for any of those things.
I don't want a Love like that, I want another... the one that I met long after the first, the one that works for me, that walks with me, that weighs nothing, that lets me eat and sleep in peace, that demands nothing of me.
I know he will respect my time and my rhythm, but I also know that if I don't live it, he will leave without saying goodbye, and only come back when he wants!
There really is no love like the first, and that's good!
